09/25/2015:

MD is a sex goddess! Yesterday morning, “D” came over around 8:00 am and when he walked in the door he said, “How can you just wake up and be so beautiful?” That is the truth! When i awaken MD for Her to stamp me before i leave, She never looks more beautiful than when She just wakes up. No makeup is needed, no hair being fixed, She just smiles and looks gorgeous!   

MD told me that “D” said yesterday that She has a “magical mouth”. i agree, but we are probably talking about two different things. i am betting that he was referring to Her incredible blow jobs where i am referring more to Her kisses. Now don’t get me wrong, i am sure “D” loves MD’s kisses and i remember Her fantastic bj’s too, but since those are reserved for Her lovers, that is not something i get to experience any longer. MD’s kisses though are soft, sexy and sensual. When MD kisses you, your knees buckle, and you don’t kiss Her as much as She kisses you. She is the giver and you are the receiver of Her kisses. MD’s kisses are difficult to explain but incredible to experience!

MD told me that “D” loves to have Her get on top and while She rides up and down on him, he gets to play with Her breasts. i have to admit that is my favorite position as well! i told MD yesterday that is the way i want go cum on my last time to have sex with Her next month. (Two weeks from today!) It is almost like watching and experiencing porn movie at the same time. You have this gorgeous redhead, with 40DD breasts on top of you, and you are getting to watch this incredible woman cum over and over again, but even though it is an amazing site, it is really happening to you.  

In spite of all of Her amazing attributes, (beautiful, “magic mouth”, incredible body, multi-orgasmic, etc.), MD’s most amazing sexual attribute is Her mind. Though MD loves sex, She also enjoys the art of flirting and teasing. She likes to “f*ck me mentally even while She is having sex another guy 30 miles away. MD knew i had a meeting with my boss yesterday morning, so right before my meeting She sent me a text saying “company is here” and a picture of Her in Her negligee. So while i am trying to talk to my boss about a project we have, in the back of my mind, i realize that MD is enjoying having sex with one of Her lovers. (Speaking of lovers, it appears that “J” may be back. His getting back with his ex, lasted just a couple of weeks, and he is wanting to see MD again.)  

Last night when we got ready for bed, i had to throw away the used condom that was on my side of the bed and put away the vibrating cock ring that “D” keeps in my nightstand. i climbed into the sheets that they had played on earlier that morning and curled in behind a sex goddess. i am so incredibly lucky!

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)

As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.  

9/20/15:The past few days we have had family in town so we have had to be very careful about displaying MD and sh. We only had two small slips, i almost called Her “Masteress” but caught myself and changed it to “Ma’am”, and in Texas that is a common expression. Later that same day, MD ordered me to do something without thinking about it, but luckily we were outside and no one overheard Her. (She didn’t even realize She did it until i mentioned it to Her later.) Though i loved having family here, i definitely wasn’t able to dress as i normally do. i had to wear boy clothes instead of my girl clothes. Even MD had to wear a nightgown to bed in case one of the grandkids came into our room.  Once we took everyone back to the airport, we came home (after stopping and having a drink!) and i got my girly clothes on and painted my toenails pink again. MD put on a dress, sans panties and bra and we enjoyed going back to our normal. i know that our normal isn’t normal to most people, but it is what works for us. i love having MD in charge and i submit and serve Her. She likes having me serve and obey Her as well as dressing me femme.  

One aspect of our life that is still difficult to get used to though, is having MD get in bed naked and i am not allowed to look at or touch Her. Usually i am in bed first and She will come in wearing only Her black robe. She will instruct me to turn my head and MD will remove and hang up Her robe at the foot of the bed, and slide in under the covers. There She is, this sexual goddess, naked in bed and i can’t even look at Her. (But it definitely is not because She is shy, on Tuesday, Dave is supposed to come over and She will be probably be naked and riding up and down on him while he plays with Her breasts!) Even if i curl in behind Her and put my arm over Her, i am not allowed to touch Her breasts. i can put my hand under them on Her stomach, but that is it. Now if She is curled up behind me, She loves to pull up my gown and put Her breasts up against my back, just to tease me. She will also put Her knee against my ass and grind away as a reminder that She can have that anytime She wants.

My normal, living with a sex goddess who i can’t see naked or touch, only serve. Seems right to me!

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)

As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.  

9/19/15:Often in the mornings when i work from home or on the weekend, i am required to put oil and lotion on MD’s feet. i usually wake up first and get on the computer and work on my blog (if i have one to write) or check emails. When MD gets up, i make Her coffee while She gets comfortable in Her chair. i will sit at Her feet and then put oil and then massage lotion on them while MD drinks Her coffee and checks Her iPad. When i am sitting at Her feet, normally i am wearing either a pink nightgown or a skirt, bra and top. After the foot massage is over, i will put on Her some special therapeutic socks and then we may chat for a while, before i begin fixing Her breakfast.  To me, this morning ritual is very symbolic of our relationship. i am at MD’s feet, serving Her, dressed as a femme. Those three attributes are very important to MD. MD enjoys having me at Her feet. It symbolizes She is the superior and i am inferior to Her; i am not at Her level, i am beneath Her. My job is not to be a leader but a follower; not a man but a sissy. In the rare times we are in the den watching TV, She will sit in Her chair, and i will sit at Her feet, for that is my place. 

i am also responsible to serve MD. Other than Her protector, that is really my only other responsibility. i am no longer Her lover, nor Her partner, i am Her servant. My focus for the day is to see how i can best serve Her. Sometimes it is simply obeying Her orders, but also it can be looking for ways to serve Her, even before She asks. If i see something She would want done, i am to do it even without being told. A good servant needs to try to see things through his Masteress eyes and try to anticipate the best way to meet Her desires, even before She expresses them.

And lastly, while sitting at Her feet, i am dressed femme. This is not a choice of mine, but a requirement of MD. MD sees me as “the wife” of our marriage and She expects me to be dressed this way. MD just ordered me a new wig, which i may soon be wearing while working at home. Another thing that MD is doing is considering putting me on some herbal supplements which supposedly can grow men’s breasts. There are a couple of varieties, that not only don’t have any size effects, (outside of growing boobs on men), but actually treat sleep disorders and night sweats, from which i sometimes suffer. When we were discussing Her purchasing them for me, (currently they are in Her Amazon shopping cart), i asked Her how She felt about me really having noticeable, feminine like breasts. Her reply was very straightforward, with a wicked grin She said, “You already wear a bra”.

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)

As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.  

9/16/15:Imagine you were given the choice between two options: The first option is that you will be permanently owned and controlled by someone. This owner would have the right to make all of your decisions; punish or discipline you in any way they want; require you to dress in femme clothing from now on; tell you that you will no longer be allowed to ever have sex and that from now on you will be kept in permanent chastity; you will be required to obey this person 24/7/365 and serve them however they wish; and for this right, you will be required to relinquish all of your current possessions and any future earnings as well. 

The second option is that you will be allowed to be the lover of the most incredible women you have ever met. This woman is not only remarkably beautiful, but is also incredibly sexy. She has long curly red hair, green eyes and 40DD breasts. She has an incredible ass and when she walks down isles guys will follow Her and even bump into things being so distracted. She can deep throat (and enjoys it); is multi-orgasmic; and seemingly can go forever sexually. She is creative in bed, an amazing lover as well as one of the most joyous and gracious individual you will ever meet.  

MD told me a week ago that there are over 5000 people who follow one of our blog sites, and i was shocked. i figured possibly a couple of hundred from the way MD described it. Not only are there a lot more people following the blog than i thought, but that they are from all over the globe. Not only from North America, but also South America, Africa, Russia, Europe, India, and the far East. There are even people in places I didn’t even know were countries, much less imagine that they would be following the random writings from a sissy sub hubby from Texas. My thought was why? What kind of people would choose to read my blog and i guess it comes down to their interest in the choices above. Would most choose option 1 or option 2? 

i know what i chose. i freely gave up the option to be MD’s lover ever again and chose to forever be owned and controlled by Her. MD doesn’t feel sorry for me in any way for the choice i made, since i did it freely and even had one full year to back out of this decision. So if She makes me get out of bed to get Her a drink; serve Her dinner and then clean the dishes; sit on the floor and put lotion on Her feet; clean the house; spank me until my ass is red; or even decide that i will no longer be allowed to have sex, that is the choice i made and i must live with the consequences and She doesn’t feel guilty in what She requires from me.

So assuming (a virtual guarantee) that the vast majority of people who read my blog are men, and knowing you could only do one or the other, what choice would you have made? All i know is i love my choice and made the right one for me!

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)
As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.  

9/14/15:Which is more humiliating, having to wear a Depend’s diaper (a woman’s one at that) or knowing that MD feels it is important that i must always wear one when going out by myself, to remind me of my place? Which is more humiliating, having to wear a bra and panties all the time or knowing that She no longer sees you as a man, but more of a femme and so that is the way you should always be dressed? Is it more embarrassing to not be able to make any decisions for yourself or realize that She believes i am “inferior” to Her so She needs to make all my daily decisions? Is it more embarrassing to be locked in a chastity device or know that MD doesn’t feel orgasms for me are no longer necessary as Her little sissy boy?MD and i have had a Domme/sub relationship since we began dating almost 18 years ago. What we have now is not even in the same league though as what we used to experience. When MD used to Domme me, the fast majority of the time is was almost “negotiated” play. I would tell Her something i was interested in or She would tell me what She wanted to try (most of the time, it was me though) and then we would try it. Though it was fun it was always very safe. i always had a safe word, we usually discussed what happened afterward and if it was good and if we liked it we might try it again. (But i always had a say in the matter.)

This is nothing like we live now in our current WLM. There is no safe word, there is no negotiating, i have no reason to tell MD what i would like to try, since in Her world it doesn’t matter, nor does She have to tell me what She wants to do to me beforehand. Everything we do now is for Her pleasure, Her interests and what She wants to try. If She wants to tie me up and spank me, it is because She either feels it is necessary to correct my behavior or simply because it gets Her off to be able to make my ass hot and red and have me crying out in pain. She doesn’t care if i would like a spanking or not. My feelings or desires don’t impact Her decisions any longer. If She wants to put a butt plug up my ass for the fun of it, or take me to get a tattoo to show Her ownership of me, it is now simply what She so chooses and my feelings or interests are of little concern to Her.

The last couple of months i have seen a huge difference in not only the way the confidence level MD displays, but also just how She treats me. She is far more comfortable requiring me to serve Her without worrying how i feel about it. It doesn’t matter if i just sat down to do something, She will tell me to get up and go do something else. In fact, i think She will often wait for me to sit down, before She tells me what else i need to do. i believe it is Her way of saying, “i control you, and just because you want to do something that is important to you, it doesn’t mean anything to me.” MD doesn’t really seem to care about whether or not i want to do something, or whether or not, i have some kind of sub interest in something She wants to do, it is simply what pleases Her or gets Her excited.

It is incredibly exciting (and a bit scary) to know that i no longer have any input in being MD’s “sub”. i don’t even think that is an accurate term any longer for me. MD is now in complete charge and every day i feel less manly, more “girly”, and more inferior to Her than the day before. Just last night i slept in the guest bedroom and realized that “our” bed is in fact only “Her” bed and being allowed to sleep in it is a privilege that i can’t take for granted.

i started this blog talking about humiliation. Humiliation is a big driver for many subs, but for me the humiliation is no longer “the acts” that MD does to me, but the true humiliation is knowing how MD sees me and us. i am Her pet, Her property, something She can do with whatever She pleases, without any reservations or consequences. It is no longer doing things to me to see whether i like it or not, it is now, whether She enjoys it or not.  

This realization is in no way a criticism of MD, actually it is my way of praising Her (not that She needs it from me), but it understanding that Her growth in feeling free to treat me however She wishes is really a huge step toward a true WLM. If She has to watch or be concerned what She does or how She treats me, then i am still in control to some extent. When She can honestly say, “I don’t give a damn how he feels”, then She is free to be the Domme and leader She desires. And when MD is the Domme She wants to be, i will finally be able to be the sissy sub hubby She is wanting me to be.

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)

As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.  

9/13/15:i am glad last week is over and a new week is starting today. MD tweaked Her back and had to go to the dentist three times, so She has been hurting all week. It was just one of those weeks where it just seems to go wrong. All three of MD’s dates were cancelled, we had something kill one of MD’s goats (Yes, MD raises goats) and MD said bye to two of Her lovers. “J” told MD that he was going to try to get back together with his “ex” for the sake of their daughter. MD wished him well and though She really does hope it works out for them, from what he has said in the past about her, She doesn’t have a lot of confidence. “M” on the other hand crossed over MD’s boundaries. He admitted that he was developing feelings for Her and wanted to truly have an affair. MD said, She liked him as a lover, but She had no emotional feelings for him and wouldn’t ever have any. He continued on and MD told him goodbye. Even after that, he tried to contact Her again, so MD had to block him from calling or texting Her. That is something MD always has to guard against, guys developing feelings or getting to clingy. i know it sounds strange, but too often guys want to get emotionally involved and MD just wants fun sex. We are looking forward to this week though. Our daughter from out of state, who just finished college, is going to visit for several days before she goes back to get ready to start her new job. The bad thing about her visiting, is all my femme clothing has to be put away, MD texting with Her guys is very limited and being MD/sh has to be curtailed a bit. Since she is not flying in until Tuesday, MD has a date for Monday with “D”, so at least She won’t have to go three weeks without sex.   

One interesting thing did come up in conversation last week. i asked MD, if it wasn’t for work, family and neighbors, how would She have me dressed? She said that if we didn’t have to worry about work or family, then i would only dress femme. She would require me to grow my hair out, i would have to wear makeup and dress full time as a woman. I asked Her if She would have me have any surgeries. She said no to that, but would at least be open to me having breast implants if the surgery was ever safe. Since we do have family and work, this is all just theoretical, but i found it fascinating that is the way MD sees me in Her mind and that would be Her preference on how She would have me live. Some wives allow their husbands to cross dress, MD would actually like to have me dressed that way full time. Though MD still refers to me as Her hubby, in many ways i think we both feel i am more like Her wife.   

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)
As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.  

9/05/15:My office is on the 10th floor, in our corporate headquarters and our department takes up a small part of the entire floor. i usually get to the office around 7:00 am, (unless i have to go in earlier because “M” is coming by to see MD before work), and began to try to get caught up with after hour emails until my employees get in the office. Once i am in the office, i notify MD that i am there and then the rest of the day, i am not allowed to leave my office without Her permission, with the exceptions, if i am going to the printer, or to speak to one of my employees. (MD says i can take care of business.) Other than that, to go the bathroom, get water or get something from the cafeteria, i must get Her permission and then text Her when i get back “locked” up in my office. i told MD that i feel like i did when i was a second grader and had to raise my hand to speak or get out of my chair.  
Though i am an “alpha male” at work, MD still demands to control me. It is one reason She requires me to wear a bra and panties to work. i may be wearing a suit (men’s clothes) on the outside, but the reality is i am a sissy boy in panties and a bra under MD’s control. The past week, i received a large bonus for a project that i have been working to complete. The money all went to MD; i won’t see a penny of it. She controls all the finances and outside of my allowance, i don’t have any say in how She spends Her money. Last week, MD was telling me that She was purchasing something, and i slipped and asked “how much is it?” She reminded me again that was none of my business and i apologized for questioning Her.  

Sometimes it is hard to realize that i have gone from being an adult man to being a sissy boy this past year and a half. MD now refers to me as Her “little boy” or Her “sissy boy”. She doesn’t see me as a man any longer and She wants me to see me as She does, a little boy who needs guidance, training, punishment and protection. But instead of a boy growing into being a man, MD is grooming me to be Her sissy. Last night when we were getting into bed, She again called me a “girl”. That is the third or fourth time the past few months, She inadvertently referred to me as a girl. In the previous 17 years of being together, MD never once referred to me as a girl until now. Her view of me is definitely changing and i expect She will make me even more femme as we go along.  

MD said, She is not wanting to have me “transition” to a woman so there will be no surgeries and due to job and family, She is not going to have me dress in public, except in certain situations. One of those situations is going to be Halloween. MD already told me that She is taking me to a party where i will be dressed as “Caitlyn Jenner”. It will be fun to be dressed femme in public, without any issues from other people. Though i am not Jewish, i wish there was something called a reverse Bar Mitzvah, and at the end i would declare, “I am now no longer a man”. Well, i guess there was, it was when i signed our WLM contract.  

Our Relationship: (Repeating on Each Blog)

As of 4/7/14, my relationship with my Wife of 16 years, changed from me being naturally submissive to Her to one where we now live fulltime in a “Wife Led Marriage” (WLM) relationship. She is now in total control of all financial, life and daily decisions. She is recognized as the unquestioned authority of our marriage and my life. My role is to be the “sh” to Her “MD”. “sh” is Her way of reminding me that i am Her “sissy”, “submissive”, “servant” and “slave” husband. The MD is “Masteress D (Her name)” or “My Domme”.