2/27/2016:This past week i have had two very embarrassing situations come to pass. The first one was about my chastity cage. The last several weeks i began dealing with the cage causing a sore. i tried various remedies, including sanding the cage in case there was a small rise that was rubbing against me, and trying various lubes. Nothing seemed to work and it kept getting worse. We took a picture and sent to the makers of the cage – and they quickly responded that the cage was too big. They said that the cage should fit the penis like a glove. Since i was having room to “expand” at the end, it was causing friction as i expanded and contracted. It appears i will have to send it back so they can shorten it.
When i first put on the cage when we received it, it did seem to fit very well; but i had noticed, i had seem to “shrink” wearing it, but wasn’t sure. i have read that some guys wearing chastity cages will experience some form of shrinkage, but once they stopped for a few days, they went back to their normal size. But the reports i read were from guys who wore it for a month or so. So far i was in wearing almost four months. In the week i have stopped wearing it, i haven’t noticed the return to my former flaccid size. Since the cage i originally ordered was not a very large one, they are now going to have to size it down another ½ inch, which will make it the next to the shortest size that they make. On their website you can order 20 different sizes from 1.25 inches to 5.75 inches. Mine will now be just 1.5 inches in length.
The second embarrassing thing, was i had to pay MD, $20 for the opportunity to lick Her ass. MD told me a few months ago, that She didn’t think i should be allowed to lick Her p*ssy any longer and that Her p*ssy was now reserved for Her lovers. She did say that She would still consider letting me lick Her ass on occasion. The last time She had allowed me that pleasure was almost 3 months ago, so i asked Her if She would consider allowing me the right to “purchase” the opportunity to lick Her. MD grinned and said She would consider it. After a few days i asked if i could offer my weekly allowance of $20 for the opportunity to lick Her and She agreed.
When i first discovered the thrill of licking MD’s ass, She would always first take a shower or wash off, but now that is no longer the case. MD tells me now that it is not Her concern whether She has taken a shower or has been sweaty. She enjoys knowing that i am going to smell like Her ass the rest of the night, since i am not allowed to go wash my face or brush my teeth afterward. i just have to turn over and go to sleep. Though She thinks is a kind of punishment, i actually love it. i love Her taste and love to smell Her; so the money spent that night was well worth it. So the last two “sexual” experiences with MD cost me $10 to hold Her boobs and now $20 to lick Her ass.
i believe that MD really enjoys making me pay for touching Her, since previously when She allowed me to play with Her in some way, i think it felt like She was “losing” a bit of Her power over me during those experiences. i mentioned in a previous blog, that for many people sex is often about power. By allowing me that level of freedom with Her, it was in some way bringing me up to Her level. By making me “pay” now for the privilege of experiencing Her, it keeps the experience more on the transactional level and thus me remaining as inferior to Her. It is still Her holding power over me and me willing to submit to the humiliation and embarrassment of having to hand over my allowance just to touch my wife.
i entitled this blog “shrinkage”. The first part of shrinkage was physical. Embarrassingly to admit, it appears that my dick is actually getting smaller, and if it gets any smaller, there soon won’t be a cage to fit it. (When MD found out that my dick was getting smaller, She thought it funny and seemed to love it!) Let’s face it, MD has no plans on using my dick any further. As long as She can keep me locked up and continue to tease me, so i am constantly in lust with Her, She is good.
The second experience this weekend is the continued “shrinkage” of my former life. Before we began our WLM, MD would often have me play with Her in various ways. She is the most sexually vibrant and expressive woman i have ever met, but now, it has come to the point that the only way She will allow me to experience Her is by making me pay Her for the privilege. i can only imagine how powerful She feels seeing me offer Her money just for the privilege to touch Her breast or lick Her ass. There is no way to describe the humiliation i feel in offering Her money just to experience Her again. But at the same time, i know that is my place. MD no longer sees me as a lover, She sees an sh who ever once in a while, if She is in a benevolent mood, will offer me the opportunity to experience Her charms one more time….if the price is right.